What is 9 + 10? 21

Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

why did little suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock: Who's there? Not little suzy Why did the car crash? Little suzy was driving Why didn't little suzy ride her bike home? She died of her injuries from the car crash

What did the black kid get for Christmas? A bike that his father paid for with the salary he made as an accountant at a local bank.

what is sad about gingers ? they are an unrecognised visible minority.

What do you call a pelican with no wings? A dead pelican

Q:what do you call a black man in a wheel chair? A: a war veteran who accidentally stepped on a land mine while trying to protect his country.

What's red and has a mask ? Blood, I lied about the mask.

3 Mormon men walk by a blonde woman eating a banana. They are not distracted by this and continue their journey of spreading Christianity.

Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice? She was making sure there was enough sugar in it in case her diabetic son was to have an attack.

Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

Why couldn't sally go on the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there Sally

What did the prostitute get after sex? Syphilis... she got syphilis

If push pops give life a push, Then isn't your mailbox purple?

How do you get an Irishman out of a bar? You politely ask him to leave.

What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

So a Jew an Asian and a gay guy all walk into a bar... ...I lied. It was an oven.

A teenage girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges on the other side completely unharmed.

68 :)

How do you know your sister is on her period? - Your dad´s dick tastes like blood.

what do u call a gay bird a gaybird

What's long, black, and sticky? Licorice.

How does Bob Marley like his donuts? He doesn't, he tragically died of melanoma in 1981.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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