What do a squirrel and a cucumber have in common? They both cant ride bikes

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If I could change one thing about the alphabet, knd stte bporw xzuor flllle !

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Asians are a lot like spongebob They're terrible at driving and good at karate.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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A man walks into a bar. Another man walks into a bar.

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Your mother is so old that she is dead.

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If I was a regular squirrel, I would be pissed at flying squirrels.

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Your mother is so rotund, in fact she went to a weight loss clinic... but gained weight

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a dollhouse in her backyard? Neither did she.

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What did the vegitarian order for dinner? Vegatables

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what is the vent wound on the ladies that can never heal???

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Sex is not the answer. Sex is a question. Yes is the answer.

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- Knock knock - I have a doorbell

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A Girl Who was very close to er grandmother got a text from her mom who was very new to texting, she thought lol meant "Lots Of Love" wel it turns out the Girl's Grandmother Passed away Sunday Morning And the Mom sent the text to the girl saying " Your Grandmother Got hit by a truck and died lol" the Girl Killed Herself that night becasue Of her mom, LESSON LEARNED< LEARN HOW TO TEXT.

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Miley Cyrus is Twerk Queen

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Hi

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wanna hear a joke? not really

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how many babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? there are no babies they are all dead in my garage

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? The same number it would take people with any other hair color.

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Can you get me a stapler,make sure it has staples because if it doesn't..........I won't be a ble to staple anything

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Q: How do you make a plumber cry? A: Kill his family.

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why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

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whats better then 10 babies nailed to 1 tree... 1 baby nailed to 10 trees!

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Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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