What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven. Ha ha ha ha

You smell like shit

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was taken to a factory where it was butchered, processed and eventually fed to America.

knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

What do you call a white man flying a plane? A pilot. What do you call an Arab man flying a plane? Also a pilot.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other one's a watermelon.

What does ms colot like to eat? Pants

What do you call a pakistani with a backpack on a plane? A passenger with ordinary hand luggage

What's green and has wheels? A green car.

Can you get me a stapler,make sure it has staples because if it doesn't..........I won't be a ble to staple anything

roses are gray violets are gray everything's gray I'm a #$%ing dog

A black man walks in to a bar, and is promptly escorted from the premises, for being under the age of 21

How do you kill zombie Jesus? You can't.

Why was the T-Rex always sad? He couldn't clap his hands.

Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

Why the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

How did the asian woman's car get totaled She was hit by a drunk driver

Why did the man run? Because he was trying to get a gold medal for the 200m at the Olympics.

Why did the Spice Girls stop performing? They mutually agreed to stop performing.

What's the cutest thing about a redhead? I know, I couldnt think of anything either

What would you call the fatty cranial mass surrounding a malignant tumor? Ted Kennedy's Head.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running from its imminent death. It was being chased by a dog with a shark's head and chainsaws for legs. It was only delaying the inevitable.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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