How do you kill zombie Jesus? You can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Roses are red, Violets are violet. You guys really suck at making poems...

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did timothy say after he went to go golf? - I just went golfing

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why cant you find your handle? Because YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why don't blind men skydive? Because it would be unwise for a man who can't see to be jumping out of planes, completely unaware of his surroundings.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How did the asian woman's car get totaled She was hit by a drunk driver

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the man run? Because he was trying to get a gold medal for the 200m at the Olympics.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the Spice Girls stop performing? They mutually agreed to stop performing.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's the cutest thing about a redhead? I know, I couldnt think of anything either

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Welcome To Facebook

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What would you call the fatty cranial mass surrounding a malignant tumor? Ted Kennedy's Head.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running from its imminent death. It was being chased by a dog with a shark's head and chainsaws for legs. It was only delaying the inevitable.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

19th amendment

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you get a clown off a swing? You hit him with an axe How can you release your anger at somebody? Kill them How do you stop a bus? Throw small children at it

thumb_up thumb_down +14

THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE! THE SALAMANDER IS NOT A REPTILE!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the guy who walked into a bar say? Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: Why was 2 afraid of 3? A: Cause 3 4 5!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops