a retard lost...

Did you hear about the guy that came out the closet while at school? Yeah, Dylan Hodge is a dick.

What do you call a middle eastern man flying a plane?? A pilot.

What do you do if you really really hate someone? You kill them. HEEE HEEE! by drew and jubie

A: Have you ever heard of a blue waffle? B: Yes, i eat them every morning... A: DO you REALLY know what a blue waffle is? B: Yes...

What do you call a shattered lightbulb? A hazard that should be taken very seriously.

What did Santa do on Christmas? NOTHING HES NOT REAL!

Why does the sultan of Turkey wear red suspenders? So that his pants wouldn't fall down.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? Because it wanted to be a monkey? Why did the John fall out of the tree? Because he has no arms and legs because he suffers from a severe case of lepracy. Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by three monkeys, a fridge and a boy with no limbs.

Colby is gay.... thats it

As Vanilla Ice once said, "If there's a problem ill resolve it."

Why did the Jew fall off a cliff? Someone pushed him

What do you call a horse with out ears? A horse with out ears?

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was peckish.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? There was a huge pile of dead babies blocking his path.

Stranger: Greetings. House-owner: No, you were supposed to say, "Knock, Knock". Stranger: Fine. Knock, knock... House-owner: Nobody's home. Stranger: These quirks are really getting on my nerve. Silly antics only serve to frustrate me. Oh, the irony!

Have you seen Elton johns pet dog? Neither he's he.

What did the Catholic Priest say to the young boy? God bless you.

How did the asian find his family? He didn't because they all look the same.

Why did the boy drop his Ice cream? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him.

Q; Why did the gas station attendant scream when 3 black men walked into his store? A: It was his surprise birthday party.

Why aren't there alligators in a bookstore? Because alligators would pose a danger to customers.

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

Q.Whats funny about death A.You die

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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