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Why did the kid stop going to school? His alarm clock broke.

i saw your mom, i said hi

Q:What is the differenc between batman and a black man? A: Batman can go out in the night with out robin

Want to hear the best joke ever? Want to hear it again?

WHY DID THE CHICKEN FART SO LOAD TO GET EVRYYBODY ATENTION

Q: How do you win the tour defrance if you have one nut? A: Hard work and dedication.

What did the salad say to the dressing? Nothing! Carrots don't talk!

knock knock, whos there? the repo man.

You know what is not cool? Fire.

What happen to Teenage Mutain ninja turtals? Go Ninja Go.

What did Obama get at the bar? A shot... In the head.

A white man, a black man, an Asian man, a Mexican man, a subasian man, an Austrailian man, and a Canadian white man. That's it.

Why did sam and jolanda drop their pudding? They got hit by a flying tree.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? Because it wanted to be a monkey? Why did the John fall out of the tree? Because he has no arms and legs because he suffers from a severe case of lepracy. Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by three monkeys, a fridge and a boy with no limbs.

What do you call a dog with three legs, is blind, and has terminal cancer? UnLucky

What do you call a fat guy falling down stairs Japan suffering.

So a duck walks into a drugstore and asks the clerk for lip balm. The clerk asks, "How will you be paying for that?" to which the duck replies, "Cash."

What did the little girl say to her step father? Please stop raping me

Why'd Katie fall off the swing? She had no arms

Your momma's so fat, her doctor seriously recommends that she lose weight for the sake of her health and happiness.

If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples how many pankackes can fit on the roof? Purple because alians do not wear hats./

Jameson: hey peter peter parker: what Jameson: do you know what my favorite kind of beans are Peter: no Jameson: van de camps

Why does the sultan of Turkey wear red suspenders? So that his pants wouldn't fall down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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