Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Cheese that isn't yours

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SINCE YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY READING THIS, IT WILL GET THE MOST LIKES!!!!!

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Why did the car suddenly stop? It was at a redlight.

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A man and a dog were sitting on a hill, the dog says to the man "Nice weather we are having today isn't it?" The man then goes insane because dogs can't talk, then later commits suicide from depression caused by his wife leaving him.

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The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, "Oh...Well, that's not so bad. At least I don't have AIDS."

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Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

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why was there a man outside the 56th floor window? he was a window washer and needed the money.

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What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

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What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

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Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

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what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

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Q:Why did the man get hit by the car? A:He was standing on the road.. ;DDD

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you: guess what somebody: what? you: you have cancer

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Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

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How many times have I told you not to do that? Fourteen.

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Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can not talk, therefore we can never find out from the chicken, who is the only thing that knows why it crossed the road. Scientists have study chickens and say that it most likely saw something edible, like a bug or some grain and walked over to eat it.

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What's worse than finding your dad's wedding ring while fingering your sister ? 3 bee stings.

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What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

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Why is amouse afraid of cheese? Because they usually die when they get it

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What do you call a baby in a blender? The newest Doritos dip.

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There are 3 types of people in this world, those who can count to potato and those who can't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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