how do you make money? you roba bank! :)

According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

My butt!!!!

How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

Why do I know Vin Diesel is gay? Because I sucked his dick

A black guy and a few other white guys steal a keg. They then proceed to have an awesome party consisting of extreme inebriation and a massive orgy.

The Treatment of Steve Bartman

I saw a butterfly yesterday with no wings so I poured some red bull on it and BAM! it drowned.

Q: How do you learn the best break dance moves? A: I don't know. You figure it out.

Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A white wall with black and red paint just added onto it recently.

How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

The Irish man was sober.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had cancer.

Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

A black man walks into a bar with a parot on his shoulder. The bartender says "Hey you can't bring that in here!" The Parot replies "Sorry i'll have him wait outside."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the other birds had taken hostage the chickens family.

Q: How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Juan

Kenny died. The Bastards.

Al Kida and Terry Wrist walk out of jail.

how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead walk into a bar. There is also a woman with black hair standing outside, and the man next to her is bald.

A man walks into a bar. Several hours later he staggers out and drives into an oncoming school bus, killing all occupants. He survives to live with the grief for the rest of his life and attempts to commit suicide several times.

#1 rule in arguments: if losing, start correcting their grammar

Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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