Knock Knock!! Who's There? No one, your being ding dong ditched!

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe. -Tag

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I'm a like whore

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What did the cop do when he saw two Mexicans buying coke? Warned them of the health risks of drinking carbonated soft drinks.

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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Q: who's Snow White's brother A: egg white Get the yolk!

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Why did alfred crap his pants? because he had downs

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Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg because if a chicken came first then that means chickens magically appeared. Eggs however may change over time through evolution by a common ancestor because after millions of years of hatching, it slowly mutated by natural selection and became to what is now known as the domestic chicken. (Applause)

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A man who was clearly tired and worn out enters a bar. The bartender says "Long night, eh?" The man responds "Yes, very. I was with my girlfriend." The bartender says in response "Well I'm sure that was a fun time, if you know what I'm sayin." "No, not really" says the man. Little did the bartender know, the man's girlfriend was a dominatrix.

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What's megan fox's bra size? Wait I got a fb notification brb!

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What type of vision does an Asian person have? 0-0 because he is blind

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A black man, a Mexican man and a white man walk into a bank. The black man reaches into his bag and pulls out his bank card, the Mexican and the the white man do the same as they need to withdraw money.

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tobi is so gay that he is the mayor of sanfrancisco

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Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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What do you call a homeless person with a dog? An animal lover.

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since when?

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A fat man fell on him

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How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why is it impossible to travel faster than the speed of light? Because it travels pretty darn fast.

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Why did the leper go back into the shower? he missed a spot.

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Q: Why don't gingers have souls? A:Ginger is a root that consumed whole as a delicacy, medicine, or spice. Why would it have a soul?

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What comes after 23? 24.

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What do you get when you mix tea and sugar? sweet tea...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops