A disabled man walks into a bar.

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Susie has Autism

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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anne hatthaway

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Roes are red Violets are blue I felt silly for writing this Because violets are violet.

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why are black people so good at basketball? Because they can shoot steal and run and they keep brass knuckles in there waste band.

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What do you call a unicorn without a horn? A horse.

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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What happens when you divide by 0? Sadly, you don't.

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where did sally go after the bombing? everywhere.

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So a man enters a local paper's pun contest. He enters ten puns in hopes that one of them would win. But unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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Whats funny about the Holocaust? Absolutely nothing considering millions of people perished and you people think its funny!

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I watched the news yesterday and they were talking about the conflict in Libya. I changed the channel.....

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Why did the zombie go to school? Zombies do not exist and certainly do not go to school.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, My Heart Skips A Beat, When I Think Of You! :D

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That moment when you touch your balls then sniff your fingers and realize it smells good.

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Why wasn't the woman cooking in the kitchen? Both her hands had been cut off in a severe conveyor belt accident.

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How do you mess with Helen Keller? Move all the furniture in her room.

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Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock The person you are seeking is deaf and cannot hear the sound that is made when your knuckles come in contact with the door. Try calling next time..........

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

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How do you kill a Chinese man? There are many ways, all of which are horrible

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a ginger has a soul

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What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? No one knows he hasn't been able to open his presents yet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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