what do you call a man with three eyes and eleven fingers? his name

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what do you call a somone who murders someone else? black.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How could you ever watch a man hit another man and say nothing? UFC is on at 9:00pm.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what do you call a black guy fixing your electricity an electrician

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's only a joke. It's not that, my wife and son were just killed in a drunk driving accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than discovering that you have contracted HIV? Stumbling upon a mass genocide. HIV's pretty bad though.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why can't Abraham Lincoln lie? Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then he sits down to enjoy his evening.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the veterinarian say to the dog? Ohhh who is a good dog? You are!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Sally sold seashells by the seashore but she didnt make any money of course. seashells on the shore can be picked up off the beach for free

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Seriously tho, too much sex? I need to know dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the man with five penises say? I have 5 penises.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How did the magician make it look like there are 2 books on the table? By putting 2 books on the table

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

thumb_up thumb_down -8

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between a cake and Jews? A cake comes out of the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why i'm breathing? I don't want die.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did one hostage say to the other hostage? Hrmfhrmfphmfr

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs? Chris

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the girl get hit by the bus. Because she was Helen Keller

thumb_up thumb_down -8

this is the part where we na na na na every good song needs a na na na na wake up at night screaming na na na na my grandmothers nickname is nana

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why aren't there alligators in a bookstore? Because alligators would pose a danger to customers.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops