Why didn't Erick have a party last week? Because his grandma died

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What do you call a man who laughed at a joke that wasn't funny? A man who gets amused at the littlest things.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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A snake walks into a bar

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Bob: why didthe chicken cross the road? Tom: why? Bob: to get to your house Knock knock Tom: whos their Bob: the chicken

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Why did the person have a scrape on their elbow? Because they fell down.

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You sneak behind it and hit a shovel across its head.

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A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Look out there's a bus in front of you

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What did Freddie Mercurys father say at Freddies funeral. "Thats the cleanest hole our Freddies ever been in".

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Why does dan leave Amy? Because dan is in another relationship and did not want to be unlawful to Amy.

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What's the difference between urinating on Lady Gaga and the american flag? It would be wrong to urinate on the American flag.

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space is fun

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What happens when you are a fat 37 year old virgin, with a small penis, poor bone structure, pale skin, a horrible personality, and no friends? You spend all night writing anti-jokes...will someone please like me?

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Why did spongebob eat Patrick Because he was hungry

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is Patrick

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Why did the monkey follow the tree? Because it was dead.

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A gay man came out 5 years ago, he also has not heard his farts since... He lost his ears in a boating accident that same year

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A platypus walks into a bar, and was the only mammal in the building capable of laying an egg.

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Laugh.

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I like my women like I like my coffee, I don't like coffee.

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Two men are in a bar. One of them turns to the other one and says, "I've slept with your mom." The other one replies "Go home dad you're drunk."

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What did little John get from reading this. Wait and you will see that the person who you were asking the question will give you a series of awkward faces until they lose interest.

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School

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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