You wanna know the funniest joke ever? Justin bieber

Hitler: I said PASS THE JUICE! not GAS THE JEWS!

What did Helen Keller see on her trip? Nothing

What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

What happened when the lawyer pissed all over the judge? He was thrown off the case, causing him to go home, rape his wife, and put a bullet into his child's head.

Knock Knock I don't have a door. I'm Homeless

Why couldn't little Sally talk? Someone stapled her tongue to wall.

Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

Whats the differance between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

man: honey im home woman: john im pregnant man: but i have a low sperm count! this is a miracle! woman: its not your baby its steves from the store man:but he's mexican! woman: i know.....i need an abortion. {lol racism}

Smart Blondes

Q: whats up? A: radiation levels in japan

Why did the black guy cross the road? To save the endangered child from getting hit by a car across the street.

twilight

Q:Why did the man get hit by the car? A:He was standing on the road.. ;DDD

A bus full of orphans falls off a cliff.

"You've got a lot of C in your body." said the doctor. Jimmy replied with glee: "Ah that's great news, vitamin C is.." "No you've got Hepatitis C, you'll be dead within a month."

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

What did Tim play with his friends? Nothing. He has no friends.

Q: "What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?" A: Dr. Dre

why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

Why did the child laugh at the anti-joke? Because it was funny

what's black and blue and has red all over it? A dead body ^_^

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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