Whats the difference between a cat and a dog? Nothing a cat and a dog is an extremely different species.

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a guy gets knocked out and wakes up in a alley all bloody and a knife next to him!!!

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why did billy drop his ice cream? he got hit by a plane that a loaf of bread was driving

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Toaster

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What's worse than dropping your icecream? Slavery

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Salad. It's green and so is The Hulk.

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

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Ya mama so fat when she went on an elevater she had no chose but to go down Hahaha I'm so so funny haha Awesome mon yeah

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Poke her face? No slap her bum!

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What's worse than being punched in the face? Being lynched.

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whats is big, black, and has big boobs. a big black guy. the boob part was a little white lie

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what happens when two small children jump into a pool full of pedophiles? They splash around and have fun

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What sound does a baby make in a blender? Idk, i was too busy masturbating to hear.

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A blonde walks into a store and tells the clerk "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes.". The blonde comes in the shop the next day with a brown wig on and says "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes". The blonde asks how he knew she was a blonde. The clerk replies, "I can see flyaway strands of your hair from the top of your wig and the synthetic hair material of the wig is not convincing.

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Why did Billy drop his lunchbox? Because he was mauled by a Hippo.

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Yo mama is... a very nice person, and her cooking is exquisite.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

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Why wasn't the rabbit elgible to vote? Because rabbits aren't human beings, and only humans are allowed to vote.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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If life gives you lemons, don't accept them because you have a citrus allergy.

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What did the doctor say when he lost his glasses? Where are my glasses?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops