What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on the front porch? Matt What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a hole? Phil What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating down the river? Bob

Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

3 dogs, a blue dog, a yellow dog, and a red dog. The owner was a man named Jeff. Now the blue dog was always sad so Jeff named him blue. The yellow dog was always scared so Jeff named him yellow. Now the red dog he was red because he had red fur, so Jeff named him red. One day when Jeff was reading his newspaper, he accidentally hit his coffee and it fell on the floor. Question: What did Jeff do? I don't know.

I accidentally washed my white Labrador retriever with three red shirts and my Red Sox baseball cap. When I went to move the laundry, the dog was drowned.

Q: What do you call a black hitchhiker? A: A hitchhiker

An Ethiopian field worker goes into work one day and finds out he was fired. Agriculture in Ethiopia is bad because it doesn't rain much.

oh hiya come in

Whats hotter than a sunny day. A pot of boiling water.

Who is a knob? ross d

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None, now stop hallutinating about wood chuck.

Roses are gray Violets are gray I am color blind

Who's a looser and has no friends??? Max!!! His address is 2131 HighHills Narrow...

Your mom is SO ugly, I entered her in an ugly contest, and she came in fourth place!

Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

- Knock knock - I have a doorbell

What's worse than a needle in a hay stack? A needle in a stack of drug addicts.

Sex is not the answer. Sex is a question. Yes is the answer.

Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

Q: What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? A: Drowning.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 ate a dude's face.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a bat and the others a watermelon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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