a guy gets knocked out and wakes up in a alley all bloody and a knife next to him!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Toaster

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worse than dropping your icecream? Slavery

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Poke her face? No slap her bum!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Ya mama so fat when she went on an elevater she had no chose but to go down Hahaha I'm so so funny haha Awesome mon yeah

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Salad. It's green and so is The Hulk.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What sound does a baby make in a blender? Idk, i was too busy masturbating to hear.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did Billy drop his lunchbox? Because he was mauled by a Hippo.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A blonde walks into a store and tells the clerk "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes.". The blonde comes in the shop the next day with a brown wig on and says "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes". The blonde asks how he knew she was a blonde. The clerk replies, "I can see flyaway strands of your hair from the top of your wig and the synthetic hair material of the wig is not convincing.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Yo mama is... a very nice person, and her cooking is exquisite.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why wasn't the rabbit elgible to vote? Because rabbits aren't human beings, and only humans are allowed to vote.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what happens when two small children jump into a pool full of pedophiles? They splash around and have fun

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats is big, black, and has big boobs. a big black guy. the boob part was a little white lie

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's worse than being punched in the face? Being lynched.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the doctor say when he lost his glasses? Where are my glasses?

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A white guy, a black guy, and a Spanish guy jump off of a building. Due to acceleration of gravity, they hit the ground at a fast speed and die.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops