What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating on the water? Dead.

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I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

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How did Helen Keller meet her husband? On a blind date.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

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Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

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tried to think of a great "anti-joke" not creative enough

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Knock knock Who's there A drummer A drummer who I'm not knocking on your door

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the the wheels.

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Fuzzy Whuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Whuzzy has no hair. Fuzzy Whuzzy has Cancer.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

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Do you know what is dead on the carpet ? Your mother

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What do you call it when someone walks on another person's head? It depends. Face up, fetish. Face down, hate crime.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The visitor is deaf and therefore does not have the ability to respond.

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My butt!!!!

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When I see Debra walking her dog in the morning I often ask myself whose walking who!?

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Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

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What do u call a black rapper who only raps about sex and money? lil wayne

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Why are cemetaries gated? Typically, to prevent vandalism and the emotional trama it inflicts on the deceaseds' families.

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Hey, look under there! Under what?

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What's worse than finding your dad's wedding ring while fingering your sister ? 3 bee stings.

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21

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Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

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Q) what do girls like long , soft (can go hard) and has white stuff come out A) Twinkies but if left out of its plastic wrapping for a long period of time it will go hard

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Why did the little girl get a haircut? A; she has cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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