Knock Knock. Who's There? Its Matt.

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how do you make a plummer cry? you kill his family

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How do you get a hot blonde to do your laundry? At knife point.

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if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

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Once my grandpa said: Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I said: No. Your generation relies too much on technology. Then I unplugged his life support.?

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a

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What did the clock say? The time.

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What did the guy who walked into a bar say? Ouch

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Whats worse then being raped? Nothing it will ruin your life.

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Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? neither has he

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had just been to their father's funeral, who was a Welshman.

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What's wrong with the beetles? They suck dick

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Why do blondes like cheez whiz? Because it tastes good

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Old McDonald had a farm But due to the lack of government subsidies, he was unable to make his mortgage payments, causing the bank to foreclose on his property.

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Lots of things. Life isn't all about you, you know.

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Why do flamingos hold up one leg?f If they held up two they'd fall down.

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Lebron James vs. Kobe Bryant

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Your mama is so fat... Haha, that's a good joke.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

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I know Mandarin, He's a good friend of mine

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SC Johnson a Family Company

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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