Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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A Jew sits down next to a muslim at the bar. They great and discuss their day's events, they both order beers. Then they go home.

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Why didn't the baby cry? It was stillborn.

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What's grey got white stripes and can't climb trees? Car park.

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What do you call cheese that isn't your's? Someone else's cheese.

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Dislike if you are gay (watch how many dislikes this joke gets :P)

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I have read and agree to the terms of service.

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what do u call a girl with cancer? bald.

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Why did the boy like watching NASCAR? He didnt because he was a fish and a secret Soviet spy

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What's worse than sibling rivalry? having no bones

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Whats worse than scraping your elbow and knee? Beheading and disembowlment.

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why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

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Kerry Katona becomes independent.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

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How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

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How can you tell if a calendar is popular? From stock order lists and also from accounts records.

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Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

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Stephen Walking.

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why did the child go to hospital with 52 broken bones,lung and kidney failure,heart disease and cut off penis. because his mum threw a fridge at mikeanator_27

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What do you call a black man with no education? An unfortunate outcome of our meritocratic society.

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Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind. Also, she's been dead for 43 years.

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whats really hot the sun

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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