A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He then proceeds to ask his wife not to leave her clothing around the house.

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what did the short man say to the shoe? i sincerely hope that someone wouldn't try to carry a conversation with an inannnimate object, or else he is socially disturbed

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What the kid with no arms get for christmas? A baseball and a glove to go through with his dad

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What's better than a worm in your apple? No worms in your apple.

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What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

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Which one is hardest?

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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what do you call a mixbreed of a bull dog and a shitzu? a sharpei

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What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

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Why did the guy throw a clock out his window? Because he was mentally unstable and needs help.

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I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

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What did the mute person say to the deaf person? Nothing.

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What happens when you shoot a priest in the heart? He dies.

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Knock knock Who's there A drummer A drummer who I'm not knocking on your door

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want a balloon? yeah

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Me and my pet lion just took a trip to his homeland of africa. It is also worthwhile to note I'm a chronic liar.

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Like if you like big tits.

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A guy comes to a doctor and says: - Doctor, lately I'm having this dream where I kill my father and rape my mother. What does it mean? - Nothing.

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Why did the baby die? Abortion

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Why did Susie fall off the swing Because she had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there... Not Susie Why did the plane crash Susie was flying it

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Pour it.

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My butt!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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