A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

roses are red violets are blue i have alzheimers roses are red

What's sad about an old black woman being hit by a Porsche? She was my third grade English teacher, and had a huge impact upon my life.

Person 1: What did the narwhal say to the other narwhal. Person 2: I don't know... What? Person 1: How am I supposed to know? Shortly after a serious argument breaks out.

What's Casey Anthony doing now that she's not in prison? She's actually living life as an upstanding citizen in Florida.

Knock Knock Who's there? Cancer

did u hear about evan porter going out with his computer of course not because u haven't read this joke yet

Why are you fat? You like devil dogs

What other than water contains H2O? The condensation reaction between two alpha glucose molecules to form Maltose.

How do you get a nun pregnant? Screw her.

Girl-Does this dress make me look fat? Boy-Hell yea you do, wait, let me speak your language...... Cows go MOOOOO -Ryan V

what is black and white and red all over a shot to death zebra

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan? Their last names.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

Follow the Yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road........except it's not yellow.

Hope you all drop the soap in prison

Roses are red Violets are blue I have AD i love squirrels

if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

Why... ...did the chicken cross the road?

-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

The 19th Amendment

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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