A man named Cecil walks into a bar. He then orders a drink.

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A guy walks into a bar. Yep.. that's it.

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What did the black man say to the other black man. We're both niggas.

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Did you hear about the big Polish tragedy? There was a power outage in Poland's busiest shopping mall, People were stuck on the escalators for 4 hours. A woman gave birth in the elevator and died.

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A man walks into a store and says "Roses are red, Violets are blue, there is a bomb strapped to my chest, give me all the money"

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What do you call the alarm system in a failing inner-city school? A dumbbell!

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A guy went to a haunted house on Friday the thirteenth… it gave him a small fright and he continued on with his day

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How does Helen Keller do her taxes? Unfortunately, she doesn't. Her friends have strongly encouraged her to proactively contact the IRS to see if she can undergo a repayment plan of some sort and obtain governmental assistance for her future filings.

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face

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What did the man say to the horse in the bar? Nothing, communication requires listening and comprehension which horses cannot process in their brains. If anything the man said it at the horse, not to him.

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What did the homosexual find when he proceeded to his mailbox? His mail.

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The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't rape, which her sister had experienced while traveling in 2007.

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Yo momma is so fat that we are incredibly concerned for her health.

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Your mama so stupid. She tried to climb over a glass wall to see the other side

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Whats the difference between an elephant and a tomato. You put tomatos in a salad.

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Knock knock GET OUTTA HERE! Jesus Christ dude I just came for some eggs!....

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarterback ever (this isn't a joke only a true statement)(this is a remake of a previous joke)

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating on the water? Dead.

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What do men and women have in common? They're both respected members of society, besides women.

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I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

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The ability to beleive it's butter. Oh shit, wrong site

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How did Helen Keller meet her husband? On a blind date.

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A black guy and a few other white guys steal a keg. They then proceed to have an awesome party consisting of extreme inebriation and a massive orgy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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