A man met a genie that granted him three wishes. I wish I could fly. The genie gave him a plane ticket. No, I want to really fly for real! The genie put him inside a plane. Okay, I wish I was unable to die then! The genie killed him. Moral: Not every story needs to make a fucking sense.

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Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer.

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why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Mom Mom who? Open the door idiot

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Silly Sally Dillydallied then lost her job to outsourcing.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My van is coming, I'm gonna get you!

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Q.why was ireland takin over by the brits A.they wanted it

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How do you know it's a Mexican's birthday? They bring cupcakes to school for your entire class to enjoy.

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What do you get when you read a book? More knowledge in your brain.

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What did the snow flake which could talk say to the other snow flake which could talk None of us are the same.

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What is it called when a Native American Indian man smacks a woman in the face for cheating on him? In police code it's called a "273D Domestic violence - Felony" most likely involving an insecure man with control problems simply adding to the stereotype that Native American's are drunk, abusive and domestically violent people.

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike when you eat them they die

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There once was a man from Nantucket, whose dick was so long he could provide women with more pleasure than the average male.

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What does A duck smoke? Quack

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A bartender walks into a bar. It's his shift.

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Guess what these words are: boo_s p_n_s _ _ ndom s_x fu_k wan_er Answers: books,pants,random,six,funk,wander.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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how did hitler fit 100 Jews in his car??? he couldn't, his car only fits 5 people.

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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Women's rights.

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Do you like flowers NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOW GET ME A COKE! And a pizza

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A grandmother in her late seventies is walking to the grocery store. Then out of nowhere,she stats getting pelted by bananas. One hits her hard on the head,and she dies.

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Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

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What's the difference between Kim kardashian and lebrOn James?? Kim got a ring this year

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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