What do you call a bunch of Mexicans on fire? Jumping Beans.

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If a wheel falls off a bus whilst travelling down a river, how long does it take to shingle a doghouse? None, because there are no bones in cottage cheese.

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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You just won the game...

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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whats blue, saggy, moldy and smelly? Will Nealis' Vagina

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A man is lonely and calls a hooker. She goes to his house, pleasures him, and then demands 42 million dollars. The man shoots the whore and throws her body into a river.

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If push pops give life a push, Then isn't your mailbox purple?

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How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

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A man runs into a bar. He is instantly knocked out.

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What does a dog do in his spare time? Lick himself.

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"why did the chicken cross the road?" "to get to your house" "knock knock" "who's there?" "The chicken"

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how many rapists does it take to screw a lightbulb?

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? She's dead.

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Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

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hey what are you eating there? a giant scorpion that tried to rape me.

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What's pink, wrinkly and hangs out your trousers? Your nan.

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Do you know what the cop said to the black guy? Your free to go

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Do Minnesotans have accents? Oh ya, you betchya.

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What is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

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Q: What did Santa give the little boy for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's not real

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im a ginger and i get beat up everyday

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Steven bought an apple And then he went home and fed it too his pet Jim (he was a fish and then sadly died from being overfed)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops