What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

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What happened to the baby that wondered into oncoming traffic? It got hit by a truck.

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69

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whats worse than not getting what you want for christmas? a child melester

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Why did the man rob a bank? Because he was poor.

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Osama Bin Laden and a monk walk into a bar. Mistaken Identity. It was the Dalai Lama, Osama is dead.

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q: why do mens testicles hang? a: so woman can kick us in em

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YEAH THEY DO.

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What happens when a man and a woman really love each other?... - They'll most likely go on a date and enjoy themselves.

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why are you adopted? cause no one loved you.

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The only hand that can beat a royal flush is Chuck Norris's hand

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A man walks into a doctor's office, he pees in a cup and is diagnosed with diabetes.

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What has wings and flies at night? A black man with wings

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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why do black people hate chainsaws? the noise they make- run nigga nigga run nigga nigga run nigga nigga

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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so one day i was getting my daughter artemisia ready for school and so i came in her room and got her pants and so i put it on and then i said did you grow during the summer really did you and then she said daddy both of my feet are stuck on one side of the leg

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What do you get when an elephant and a penguin have a baby? Dunno, it's seems highly improbable.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Why did the black guy only turn left? Because he was mentally retarded and couldn't tell left from right and had no idea where he was going

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Roses are red, Violets at blue. My mind is twisted, Bend over bitch your about to get fisted.

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What happened to the man that took too much viagra? His erection lasted longer than 4 hours, he's dead now

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Q: What's the difference between a basket of tennis balls and a basket of dead baby heads? A: One is used for the sport of tennis the other is a basket of tennis balls!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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