Why didn't the blind girl say hi to anyone? Because she was blind.

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Why couldnt the boy lick his elbows? Because he lost his arms after he was violently beaten by his drunk father with a bat.

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What do you call a cow that went through a earth quake? A dead cow.

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wanna hear a joke: women's rights

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Two guys walk into the woods an saw a naked lady.One guys ran away. When his friend met up with him he ask why did u run away. He siad "my mom said if i a naked lady that i would turn to stone and i felt myself getting hard."

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What do you call a blind fish? Amblyopsidae.

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Mitt Romney.

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WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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chuck norris's tears cure cancer, to bad chuck norris never cries

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what happened the magic tractor?..... it turned into a field

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so one day i was getting my daughter artemisia ready for school and so i came in her room and got her pants and so i put it on and then i said did you grow during the summer really did you and then she said daddy both of my feet are stuck on one side of the leg

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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How do you kill a Mexican? Rupture its vital organs like any other organism ,but murder is wrong and should not be done under any circumstance

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What's round and red? A red and round solid.

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whats worse than shitting in a urinal??? shitting in a shower

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, you should be a con artist.

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what rhymes with pirates? not Somalia because i don't consider a inflatable boat a pirate ship.

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Does this napkin smell like chlorofoam?

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What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

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Doctor: your mom has cancerous aids Me:*sob*

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anne hatthaway

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Hi my name is Jim

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What's the difference between a wife and a chef? A chef has the choice to leave the kitchen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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