How do you scare a 5 year old girl? Stick your dick out.

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What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory? Quality control or some other function.

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A Blonde, a Jew, a Rooster, and a Mexican walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

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Why did your mum have sex with my mum? Because they're lesbian.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

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Knock knock What

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

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Q: Why did the baby stop crying? A: Because it was satisfied.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue A Face Like Yours Belongs In The ZOO. :o

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Why do you believe in evolution? Because it increases the power of my pokemon.

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Why don't blind men skydive? Because it would be unwise for a man who can't see to be jumping out of planes, completely unaware of his surroundings.

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hi michael

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What did the Muslim say to the Sikh? "Hello. Lovely weather today."

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how do u make a sausage roll push it down a hill

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What is next?

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One day a man runs into a bar. He is already drunk and jumps through the window. This is illeagal, so he was arrested, stoned and killed.

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a

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road, and then come back halfway? A: He was racing his friend to the other side. He didn't realize his friend got hit by a truck until he looked back. He continually cried until finally he got it together and walked over to his dead friend. He wasn't paying attention though, and another truck hit him. The truck driver continued his road trip and bought KFC for dinner.

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whats brown and smells like shit shit

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How do you keep a black man from robbing your house? Lock your doors, or perhaps get a update-to-date security system.

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrarri? A dead baby is a non-living human, while a Ferrarri is a brand of car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops