why was the boy mad at school? something probably upset him.

What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Why couldnt the boy lick his elbows? Because he lost his arms after he was violently beaten by his drunk father with a bat.

Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

Why didn't the blind girl say hi to anyone? Because she was blind.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he fell off a cliff

What should you do when your refrigerator is running? Tell it to FREEZE!

Your mother is so fat. But I'm fine with it.

Your mom is so fat, She should go to a doctor because her cholesterol is abnormally high.

A man walks into a bar and says "hey, it's me!". Turns out that wasn't him.

Why did the baby start crying? Its mom slapped it in the face, causing permanent brain damage that would haunt it throughout its life.

so one day i was getting my daughter artemisia ready for school and so i came in her room and got her pants and so i put it on and then i said did you grow during the summer really did you and then she said daddy both of my feet are stuck on one side of the leg

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

What do you call a blind fish? Amblyopsidae.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, you should be a con artist.

how big is a midgets dick? i dont know but probably bigger then mine

chuck norris's tears cure cancer, to bad chuck norris never cries

-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? -Dog shit.

what happened the magic tractor?..... it turned into a field

Doctor: your mom has cancerous aids Me:*sob*

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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