A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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Mr Webb *Hit keyboard loudly* -...

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A man walks into a bar. He pulls out a knife, shoots the bar tender, and then kills himself.

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Q: What's better than ice cream? A: Two ice creams! Q: What's better than 2 ice creams? A: Still two ice creams!

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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WHO LIVES IN A TIN SHACK THUMB MOUNTNORIS ALCATRAZ MAGHBARREY MUSTARD GAS MILK STAIN REGESTERED S.O SCREAMS MADELINN SBB OPERATION SBB FREE MEAT SANTA GREASE 590 ENGLISH FOLDER SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB SBB !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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You's so ugly you should consider facial reconstruction surgery if it's covered by your insurance.

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There is a British man, a Mexican man,and a American man on a boat. The captain sad the boat is carrying to much weight so the each have to throw off something they have to much of. The Brit throws tea, The Mexican throws tacos, and The American throws the Mexican.

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Womens rights

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings

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so there are two muffins in an oven. one muffin says to the other muffin, "hey is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin says, "holy sh*t your a talking muffin."

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whats brown? poop.

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What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know.

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Nohypocondrism: When you feel fine and everyone keeps telling you you are a sick bastard. Charisma: Hey, that guy that changed my life killed the neighbor, cool rite? I mean that damn neighbor did say nothing to me when I said hi. Solitude: When the room is so overcrowded that you feel small and alone. I think that people that are jack of all trades and master of none are stupid... I AM JACK OF NO TRADES AND MASTER OF ALL! I am nothing, because nothing lives on forever, nothing is unbreakable, nothing is really awesome on a terrible day... I am also Nobody, because Nobody has more money than me.. FUUUUUUUU..

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Your so stupid, that your stupid.

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Blind people can't read this.

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What do you call a dog with three legs, is blind, and has terminal cancer? UnLucky

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What do you call two black men kicking a ball? Soccer.

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Bob: why didthe chicken cross the road? Tom: why? Bob: to get to your house Knock knock Tom: whos their Bob: the chicken

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What is smelly and sticky A poo

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women's rights

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A cow walks into a store. The clerk asks "how may i help you sir?" The cow says "Im a cow stupid!" and storms out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he obviously had to attend to his planned schedule which involved a meeting which was to take place on the opposite side of the road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops