My penis is small, Just kidding, it's huge.

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69

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What do you call a Muslim running a country? Obama

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There's 2 cows, one says to the other "What do you think of Mad Cow Disease?" The other says, "I don't care I'm a helicopter"

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How many Wal-Mart employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, assuming he can reach it safely.

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Why you so fat... Because you have an eating problem fatass...

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Potato

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Why are hookers and babies so alike? You can have sex with both.

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A baptist priest walks into a bar with a boner.

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Blonde walks into a bar. Man walks up to blonde and says a pick-up line. Blonde says "Crap, this is a gay bar?"

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knock knock

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A man walks into a bar and talks with his friends. One of his friends said " Hey, who farted?" When the bar closed, Joe realized it was he who farted.

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mc hammers income.

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A black man, a Jew, and a homosexual are at a bar together. They drink for a few hours, during which time they catch up with each other and share stories, as it has been some time since the three of them have seen each other. After they are done drinking, they call a friend, who comes to pick them up and take them home. What a fine example of drinking responsibly.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet. You guys really suck at making poems...

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how do u make a sausage roll push it down a hill

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Knock Knock Who's there? Cancer

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Why didn't the pro-choice, pregnant woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots. They all miss.

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Q: Whats better than getting raped by a dog? A: Getting raped by a cat.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? scream in her ear.

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John: Hey Bill, ORANGE you in the mood to go to a Phillies game? Bill: Yes! So let's make like a banana and raise our potassium levels drastically and leave right away to beat the rush hour traffic.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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What did the orange elephant with 6 legs say? Kill me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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