What did you say? I don't know.

Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

How did the stapeler disappear? I ate it.

What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

A bus full of orphans falls off a cliff.

I used to not like my beard, but then it grew on me.

Paul Dylan King!

How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

Women's football

Q: What's a Mexican's favorite sport? A: Cross Country

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

what is the difference between a indian and a trampoline? you take you shoes off to jump on the trampoline.

A Rabbi, A Priest and an Imam walk into a bar. The Imam doesn't order a drink because it is strictly against his religious beliefs.

roses are red violets are blue i took your cup to the bathroom ...thats not really apple juice:)

What did batman say to robin befor they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

Why did Susie fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

What call a duck with no wings? A deformity.

Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stappled to the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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