Your mother is so unintelligent that her IQ score is equal to or lower than 2 standard deviations below the national average of 100 on the Mensa approved intelligence test that has been properly administered and supervised.

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What is underneath Chuck Norris' Beard? His Chin

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A man walks into a zoo. There is only one animal, a dog. It's a shitzu.

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A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

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Why was the boy praying? Because both of his parents had just been brutally murdered in front of him and he was analy defiled by the assailant and left alive to have live with the pain of seeing both of his parents be killed. He had also dropped his lollipop.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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Why did the girl get hit by the bus. Because she was Helen Keller

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Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

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What do a white dog and a black dog have in common? They're both white...except for the black one

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What do Bear Grylls drink under breakfast? Tea.

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Why wasn't the woman cooking in the kitchen? Both her hands had been cut off in a severe conveyor belt accident.

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Hellooooo whos there? Its me fred Fred? A Canadian

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two blondes walk into a bar... to get to the other side

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Whats worse than an old guy? An old woman!

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Cows make a world go round and round They also live in the town town town They make a funny sound sound sound MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO Where do cows go on saturdays? The MOOvies I am Cow Hear me MOO I weigh 10 times more than you! Why are cows black and white? Cause they dont want to be racist

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Why couldn't the young girl play outside with her friends? She was bed ridden with terminal cancer.

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped

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What's white and looks like a refrigerator? A baseball

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69, hahaha

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Whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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After a long romantic date with my girl friend I went home. Upon walking to my bathroom for a dootie i realize that I'm gay. So I break up with my girl friend and I am now in a wonderful relationship with Jose, He sell's sea shells at discount prices.

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What does a Dominican and a Russian have in common... they are both thinking of a funny anti-joke to post on this site...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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