What's worse than your family dying in a fire? Nothing, that really sucks.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

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it was christmas day and the boy opened his first present... and he immediately got aids.

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women outside of the kitchen

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Doctor- Mr. Smith I have some bad news for you. Mr. Smith- Just tell it to me straight. How long have I got? Doctor- Not long. Mr. Smith- OK.

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- Knock knock - Those knock jokes are getting old - Indeed. Scratch scratch - MY DOOR

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Why you so fat... Because you have an eating problem fatass...

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Potato

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What's yellow and if it gets in your eye, you'll die? a yellow train.

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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Three blokes walk into a bar. I'm british.

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What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? heart worms

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How do you get a clown off a swing? You hit him with an axe How can you release your anger at somebody? Kill them How do you stop a bus? Throw small children at it

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Hey I had a wet and dirty dream about you last night. Really? What happened? You got hit by a bus and I pissed myself laughing. .......

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why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

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Dear Board of education, so are we.

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So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

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knock knock.. who's there? ted? ted, who? STOP f***ing around, you got cancer!

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Q: What did the latino kid get for christmas? A; Nothing because he died two days before

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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John: Hey Bill, ORANGE you in the mood to go to a Phillies game? Bill: Yes! So let's make like a banana and raise our potassium levels drastically and leave right away to beat the rush hour traffic.

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why is a squirrel called a squirrel? that's its name.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Open the fucking door. Open it! This is a fucking robbery. This is not a fucking joke. Get down on the ground. Shut that baby up. Shut that fucking baby up! Now! Get on the fucking ground or I swear to Christ I will fucking end your life. Tell the kids to go to their room. Do it. Do it, you fucking bitch! Where's the fucking jewelry? You got any money stashed anywhere? Come on, I know it's here. Keys? Your husband got any guns? Give me everything valuable or I swear to god, I will fucking murder you in front of your son. The woman was brutally raped for hours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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