Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

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The mighty wizard said "come fourth cowardly lion and receive bravery" but he came fifth and got absolutely nothing. Todo came fourth and got the bravery.

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What is woman spelled backwards? namow.

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What happened after Peter broke his toe? He went into cardiac arrest and died.

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A muslim bought tickets for a 3pm flight. It was 11am, so in the mean time, he went to a bar to loosen up. His bomb vest accidently went off early, killing everyone in the bar. The flight arrived on-time in San Fransico.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a women. Statutory rape.

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Thumbs down if you like this anti-joke!

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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Why did the black man fail math? He had missed many classes due to his mother's terminal cancer.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and death, making her oblivious of her surroundings and would be a danger to fellow commuters. -mac

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"Hell nahhh I called shotgun" -Rosa Parks

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whats gayer than 2 homosexuals? 3 homosexuals.

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What's the difference between George Washington and Wiz Khalifa? George Washington died many years ago.

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Anti-joke.

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What did the black man say to the Mexican? What a fine day it is!

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roses are red, violets? are blue, Im not good at poems, tits

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roses are red violets are blue shut the fuck up or ill fuck you

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A man forgets to hang his food in a tree on a camping trip. A bear comes and kills his wife and two kids but leaves the man to live with the guilt for the rest of his life.

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Your Mom is so poor she can't afford home-owners insurance.

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What's chris benoit doing? Just hangin in the gym

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, My Heart Skips A Beat, When I Think Of You! :D

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Joseph. Joseph who? Joseph Brown. Oh, hello Joseph! Why don't you come in? No thank you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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