Roses are red Violets are blue im a retard dictionary

Did you hear the story about the divorcee who was concerned about ecology? Her husband had been hitting her. Good for her to get away from that kind of abuse.

Why do women hate getting shot? They die.

Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

Jennifer Kim is the nicest person I have ever met, everyone loves her.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why couldn't she get back up? She blew up

Yo mama so fat, she farts dust

Q. How is a monkey like a tricycle? A. They both have handlebars... except for the monkey.

How do you make time fly? You throw a clock off a building

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face. Why was the little girl sad? Because it was her frog.

2 snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.... ba dooom chesh

( o Y o )

What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

Q: What's long and brown? A: The unemployment line.

An eyeball walks into a bar and the bartender asks him what he would like. The bartender promptly wakes up in jail because he was caught having a meth lab in his basement.

How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her what her name is

What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? One is a sports car and the other is a baby that is not alive.

What do you do with dead chemists? You carefully place their remnants in a casket, which is to be placed in a precisely dug hole. Once the casket is placed, you put a gravestone into the ground, signifying the chemists' date of birth and death.

Knock Knock Who's there? A Kid With ADD A Kid With AD- Oh Look! A Squirrel!

how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? one and a ladder

What did Dela Ware? Nothing.

A black man didn't walk into a bar

What's the difference between a Ginger and a Brick? A ginger is a living organism.

What is the answer to number 7 on the test? Time for you to get a watch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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