Tom Petty walks into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you are visibly intoxicated. We cannot sell you liquor." The bar explodes because someone said no to Tom Petty.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call Justin Beiber having sex with a woman? Gay

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q.What is the bigest lie in the universe? A. I have read and agree the the Terms of Service.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats worse then failing ur English test? Getting hit by a train

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's clear and wet? water

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

thumb_up thumb_down +14

If your South American in the kitchen, what are you in the bathroom? European ( your a pee an)

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Penis!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did kurt cobain kill himself? He was experiencing heavy depression

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the dinosaur say to the caveman? Nothing. Dinosaurs were wiped off the earth due to a tragic, world wide extinction about 65 million years ago while small mammals which would eventually evolve into humans survived.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the grandson inherit when his grandmother died? Nothing, they both were killed in a tragic car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did timothy say after he went to go golf? - I just went golfing

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Do you ever feel, like a plastic bag? No, because plastic bags are man-made inanimate objects.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's hard and straight going in, and soft and sticky coming out? chewing gum

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Say, "Wake up!"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Come In!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why? Because!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

The cow went moo

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats worse than finding a jew in your bed. Jake skellern

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops