What do you call someone in Manhattan who goes to see a Broadway show and then stops in at a local bar for a few drinks? A taxi, if they request you do so.

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want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

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What's better than getting to sleep in? Sex for the very first time.

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Nobody cares.

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a korean guy robs a black guys convenient store!

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roses is red violet is blue i will smack you

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Why did the guy throw a clock out his window? Because he was mentally unstable and needs help.

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can't wait until the baby boomers die

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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How heavy duty are your nachos? No, because babies simply cannot swallow blenders.

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Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

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Why do teenagers, especially girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and creates a fanbase large enough to promote his career thus increasing profits which provides him a better quality of life and great financial future

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Why could the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

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Why couldn't the eleven year old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-14 and he was unaccompanied by a mature adult.

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How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

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Knock Knock Who's there? No one was there. It was two birds flew into the door and died.

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Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

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Society.

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

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Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

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why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come home from camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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