That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

A black man walks up to the cashier with twenty buckets of KFC and seventeen gallons of grape Kool - Aid. The cashier says, "Do you want a bag for those?"

What do you get when mix an orange with juice? Orange juice.

How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except it didn't work for the boy with ice cream.

A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

whats retarded and looks like a fat duck? GEorge goodburn

Why did the blonde put tip-ex on the computer screen? To spite her physically abusive husband

Whats the best way to get a woman to sleep with you? Rape her

A Japanese man walks into a bar, it collapses and then is demolished by a tsunami.

What did the girl with no hands get? Gloves.

why did the nazi eat the jew? He didn't

Make an effort in life whenever you want. Fight trough life when you got no other choice.

Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

What's harder than nailing a baby to a tree? My penis whilst im doing it.

Where did Martha go after the explosion? Everywhere.

Your mom is so dumb that she doesn't get this joke

What do you call a whore? Kelsey cook duh

There once was an X from place B, Who satisfied predicate P, Then X did thing A, In a specified way, Resulting in circumstance C.

what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

Why did the baby cross the road? It was being dragged by a truck

What is underneath Chuck Norris' Beard? His Chin

You have 6 basketballs. One rolls away. How many do you have? None because your family has a low income, lives in a broken down trailer, and has 5 other kids to supply for.

roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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