HAHA SO ONE TIME... The man could not finish his story because he gets shot, and is mourned for years. His daughter was watching it all. She then jumped. And fell. And broke her knee. And then died. yeah

Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

Roses are red, violets are blue, trains.

why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

How do you make a teacher cry? Shit in their water bottle.

What comes to mind when you say the word "Mind?" Your Mind

Why did jack smell smoke in his neighborhood? His house burnt to the ground.

What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? I'm not sure, but I would probably have nightmares for a couple weeks.

Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

27

Why was Timmy sad?

Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

What has 4 eyes but can't see? A blind man wearing glasses.

stop it ryan vallee

Why did Bill yell? Because he stepped on a nail.

What is invisible and smells like bananas? Monkey Farts.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

Why did the gambling addict go into the casino? To use the bathroom

Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John Wayne Gacy.

Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

Why did Timmy stop running? He got hit by a bus

D is for diabetes, Cookie Monster, if you keep this up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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