What is blue and smells like red paint, Blue Paint

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"Up to 50% off."

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sarah taylor

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a guy walked into a bar and said "ow!"

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Why was Jimmy upset? Someone kept pouring liquid nitrogen on him.

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How do you prevent aids? Nail an orphan to your genitals before sex.

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Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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roses are red violets are blue i have alzheimers roses are red

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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what did the little girl with no arms or legs get for her birthday? a bike.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

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why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuable prizes

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What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

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Q: What do you call a Deer with no eyes? A: No ideer. Q; What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? A: Still no ideer.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, and mute child get for his birthday? Nothing, his parents hate him.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

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Why did the african man wear no clothes? Because he liked being naked.

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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What's worse than 1000 babies tied to a tree? 1 baby tied to 1000 trees.

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What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? While Beethoven enjoyed many different varieties of fruit, he found strawberries the most appealing.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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