What did Santa do on Christmas? NOTHING HES NOT REAL!

Christians pornstars.

Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

A cow walks into an Asian bar and asks for a beer. The bartender asks it for I.D. It says "it doesn't matter. I came by horse."

knock knock who's there? a murder who? a murder who kills you and your family.

What did the Shark say when he had no lunch? We have a FISHue!

Yes, finally caught that mouse!

A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

what is the difference between pizza and a Jew? pizza is a common Italian meal and a Jew is a member of a monotheistic religion

How does a black guy call to another black guy in Africa? using a telephone

Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

Who's gay and has buttsex? Dan.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

knock knock. Who's there? Jehovah's witness. *Door Locks*

The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

Why do policemen wear belts? To hold up their pants.

what is long, black and looks like a curly-hair? A curly-hair

Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

BWAT

Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

what did the black guy get for christmas? a car because he really wanted one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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