Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

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The World Record For Longest Game of Hide and Seek goes to... Binladin

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So a man was walking down the street with bananas in his ears when he saw one of his friends coming the other way. When they met up the one friend asked, "Hey you know you've got bananas in your ears?" To which the man replied "What? I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? I don't Know, but we should inform the RSPCA.

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What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

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Chuck Norris doesn't shave.

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Why was the guy shot? He was a soldier in World War 2. Lots of people were shot.

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why did the monkey fall out the tree? he lost his grip

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Two Japanese men walked out of a bar. They drowned.

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yo mama so old she was a waiter at the last supper.

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You know what your problem is? I'm too good looking.

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what do you call a black guy fixing your electricity an electrician

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A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

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Roses Are red violets are blue I HAVE FIVE FINGERS THE MIDDLE IS FOR U

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What did the black kid get for christmas? Nothing, he doesn't celebrate christmas

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"knock knock" "ill get it honey" "no stay in the kitchen bitch!"

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how do you kill a jew? inject him/her with gratuitous amounts of cyanide until they cease to have brain function and a pulse.

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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What do you eat when you watch porn? Corn

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Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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