What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

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A man walks up to a dead baby. The baby is dead

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What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

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Why did jack smell smoke in his neighborhood? His house burnt to the ground.

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Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

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A genie came out of a lamp explain?

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Answer: Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

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What did the priest say to the nun? ... I don't know, I wasn't there.

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What's the difference between Kim kardashian and lebrOn James?? Kim got a ring this year

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Person1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person2: I dunno.-. to get to the other side? Person1: :( I dream of a better tomorrow where a chicken can cross the street without having his motives questioned

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

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What do you get when you divide 60000 by 30? A Number

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How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

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Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

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why did the dog go inside the church? cuz the door was open.

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What did the dog say to his owner? Nothing, dogs do not have mouths that are shaped for forming words. Talking would require too many complex movements of the mouth, and since a dog's brain is very small, it would not have the capacity to hold that much information.

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Why did the penguin go to the cookie shop? He didn't, penguins don't eat cookies

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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Q: Little black thing with a little red thing on it. What is it?! A: Ant with a broken nose...

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- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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Two women were sitting together, quietly.

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Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops