One man says to another "Hey you have banana in your ears." The other man replies "I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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math test 2=2

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting fisted by hulk

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A Priest, a Minister, and a Rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, "What is this, a joke?"

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There are two gingerbread men in an oven and the one says " it's hot in here" the other says "holy crap it's a talking cookie!!!!!!!!"

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2 guys walk on the street and see a pile of crap. One says "That looks like crap." The other one stops and looks at it for a few seconds and says "You're right it is crap." They both avoided stepping on the pile of crap and continued on their walk.

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The Irish man was sober.

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Women's Sports

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Christopher Walken to a bar.

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What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson molested boys.

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How do you stop a fire breathing dragon from breathing fire? Shove a hose down its throat.

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What did the cab driver say to the duck who wanted a ride in the cab? Get out of the cab.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

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A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

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What do Ethiopian children do at night? Starve

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That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

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What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? I'm not sure, but I would probably have nightmares for a couple weeks.

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What happened to the adventurer ? He took an arrow to the knee and became a guard.

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What disease did the gay man get from his partner? Streptococcus!

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A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

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Cows go moo.

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

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What do you call someone with no legs? whatever their name is, physical appearance should have no bearing on someones title.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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