Whats worse then a pile of dead babies? One live baby at the bottom, eating its way out.

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what's red and blue? your heart

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What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? Fix it, call a repair man, call the landlord, do the dishes by hand or don't do them at all... your options are endless.

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What do we want? Chips!! When do we want them? Chips

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knock knock? whos there? eatmop. eatmopwho? HAHAHAH EAT MY POO

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i dislike sack in my mouth

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who has no significant other or personal life? who ever is on anti-joke.com

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Why was 1 afraid of 2? Because 234!

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Why did the little boy drop his Ice cream? He had no arms(:

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what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

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What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

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sooo.how do you get a bonner when your in a room with lady gaga???? you tell lady gaga to turn around and you think of brittany spears bending over get it nahhh probably not

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

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How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

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want to hear a joke? Woman's rights

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why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

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what is white and black and red all over? a half eaten penguin

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There are two gingerbread men in an oven and the one says " it's hot in here" the other says "holy crap it's a talking cookie!!!!!!!!"

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Why did the monkey fall off his tricycle? He got hit by a fridge.

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Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

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Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

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Dat ass, or dem titties? Your choice.

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A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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