What do you call a dog that's half poodle, half bulldog? A dog.

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Why can't Kevin run with scissors? Because he killed himself.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her...

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Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

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do you know what i see in the perfect girl? my dick.

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What did the deer say to the hunter? Deers are animals, they haven't yet evolved enough to talk..

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A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

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How many small children does it take to change a light bulb? None. Children are not old enough to do this by themselves.

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why did the painter cry? he didnt have any paint left...

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Why was the black man shot, He resisted against a highly political challenger. Unfortunately for him the Armenian politician was not a very nice guy.

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A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

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Enchilada

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anne hatthaway

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

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Why did Mary fall of the tire swing? Because she's a dumbass

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wheres a place a cancer patient cant go? the hairdressers

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What's worse than an empty bottle of Yoohoo? Literally nothing.

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Three hispanic men pull up to a suburban residence. They pick up their friend and go see a movie.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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What is funnier than dead babies? Dead babies aren't funny, Carlos Mencia and Tom Bergeron are funny.

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Help! I'm locked in a anti-joke factory!

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where did Bob go during the bombing attacks? All over the walls.

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If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

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Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops