A drunk guy walks into a bar and falls flat on his back. Upset, he then finds a bathroom. An hour later he is arrested for beating off in the bathroom. off is pressing charges.

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

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Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

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Q. How is a monkey like a tricycle? A. They both have handlebars... except for the monkey.

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Roses are red Violets are blue What was I saying? Oh yeah, your adopted.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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That guy is so lame, he needs a wheelchair to go places.

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A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share personal information with a stranger.

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alert("The Game");//

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Q: Why did the horse put on cologne? A: He wanted to smell nice.

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A flock of ostriches run into a mine field

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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how do you kill a zombie? Zombies arent real.

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"Up to 50% off."

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Yes. Just Yes.

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A christian was diagnosed with cancer. He refused chemo and prayed to god. Eventually, he died.

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why did the koala fall out of the tree it was dead why did the 2nd koala fall out of the tree it was hit by the first koala why did the 3rd koala fall out of the tree it thought it was a game why did the 4th koala fall out of the tree it was fit by a fridge why did the 5th koala fall out of the tree it was inside the fridge why did the 6th koala fall out of the tree it was punished for dropping a fridge why did the 7th koala fall out of the tree it committed suicide after framing the 6th koala

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Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

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What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks then goes home.

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What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating

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why did the chicken cross the road? to give a doctor the cure for cancer but some ass hole ran him over

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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