What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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What are the black specks in birdshit called? That's birdshit too.

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What's worse than an empty bottle of Yoohoo? Literally nothing.

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An Irish man willingly walks out of a bar

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A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The road was Catholic, and it couldn't cross itself.

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Guess who didn't have breakfast this morning? Kids in Africa

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- knock knock. ... - knock knock. ... - heey! ... (There is nobody at home.)

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What do you call a dumb Asian? An Asian who lacks education.

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A baby crawls into an abortion clinic.

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Q. Why did the monster have eight legs? A. I don't know.

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what did the cheese say to the wall? nothing cheese can't talk.

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There's two men on a subway. One says "Hey, that's my sandwich.".

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A Muslim get's on a plain. He is heading to Spain, and has a lovely time.

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What's green and has wheels? Green cars.

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Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

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Knock knock Who's there My dick

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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Why did the boy die at his Halloween party? He was the victim of a drive-by.

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Im Jackson Sinclair and Me and Carter Weeks-69;)

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How do you prevent aids? Nail an orphan to your genitals before sex.

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Chuck Norris

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Ask me if I'm a peanut. Are you a peanut? Yes. Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No, I'm a peanut.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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