Why didn't Jimmy's mum come to the school play? She had a heart attack

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A jewish man is sitting on a bench. A german man then proceeds to sit down next to him. They say nothing to each other.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What happens when you are a fat 37 year old virgin, with a small penis, poor bone structure, pale skin, a horrible personality, and no friends? You spend all night writing anti-jokes...will someone please like me?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the penny say to the other penny? Nothing, because pennies can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why didn't the black man pay child support? He had no children.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Whats the worse than dieing of cancer, dieing alone and having AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the chicken cross the road To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A cow walks into a store. The clerk asks "how may i help you sir?" The cow says "Im a cow stupid!" and storms out.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Hey Nerochan, how high is your IQ?

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired. I was jerking off during the entire plane ride.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What did the elephant say to the goldfish? Nothing. Animals are unable to speak and fish aren't able to live on land

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q: why are black people so good at basketball? A: because the can shoot and steal:)

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why did the blonde put lysol in the soup? to kill her husband

thumb_up thumb_down -37

As for regarding the Win/Win/Win/sore ass kid comment below... Why not? There is too much Win in order to worry about some fucking soreass thats just gonna grow up to be a slut... RIGHT? Your friendly r*pist Neighborhood r*pist Moral: Man: "He or she who knows I am right, will be be the only one left" Btw, I am the Anti-God, what else can I be? You are the ones that killed Christ Ahahahahahaha! Political humor bonus because my satisfaction of owning you all and your entire screen. Are you Right Winged? Or wrong Winged?

thumb_up thumb_down -41

what do you call a black man being hung from a tree? -prejudice

thumb_up thumb_down -43

How is a white orphan like a black baby? Neither are sure who their parents are :(

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Chuck Norris drove to McDonalds and ordered a Whopper. Much to his dismay, McDonalds does not make Whoppers, because that is the signature fast-food burger of McDonald's biggest competitor, Burger King.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

If life throws you melons you might be dyslexic, but you also might not be.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops