An Irish man willingly walks out of a bar

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What was the color blind boy's favorite color? I don't know? neither did he

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What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

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- knock knock. ... - knock knock. ... - heey! ... (There is nobody at home.)

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Guess who didn't have breakfast this morning? Kids in Africa

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Q. Why did the monster have eight legs? A. I don't know.

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A baby crawls into an abortion clinic.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The road was Catholic, and it couldn't cross itself.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Kconk Kconk who? Kconk Ohw Oh yeah, sorry mate, didn't recognise your voice! Come on up, I've got some lagers in the fridge.

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How do you catch a squirrel? Use a live, humane trap, and release it back into the wild afterwards.

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A Muslim get's on a plain. He is heading to Spain, and has a lovely time.

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The French guy and the Italian guy got in the bar at the same time, but they didn't talk as they didn't know each other.

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what did the cheese say to the wall? nothing cheese can't talk.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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What's green and has wheels? Green cars.

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Knock knock Who's there My dick

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Kah-________-

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' cheese

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whats long and black? a baton

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Guess what, I have cancer.

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lick my ballsack.... ok

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Ask me if I'm a peanut. Are you a peanut? Yes. Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No, I'm a peanut.

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whats the differnce between a corvette and a pile of dead babies??? i dont have a corvette in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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