What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

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di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

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Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

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Chayton

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The French guy and the Italian guy got in the bar at the same time, but they didn't talk as they didn't know each other.

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Your mother is so fat, that the doctor said, "Go on a diet or you will get a Cardiac Infarction."

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There is a knock on the door. Little Jimmy comes dowstairs opens the door and standing in the door way is the axe wielding manic fromTexas Chainsaw.

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Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

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Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

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What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? Wait a week.

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what is the difference between oral sex and anal sex? one has to deal with a butt

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Three blondes walk into a bar. I prematurely ejaculate.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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What do you get when you mix a mexican and a frenchman? A person of mixed racial heritage.

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A Priest and a Rabbi pass a Muslim boy sleeping on the street. The Priest remarks "What a tragedy"; the Rabbi agrees and they both open non-denominational homeless shelters in their temples.

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Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

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What's worse than dropping your sandwich. Dying of pancreatic cancer.

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What do you eat when you watch porn? Corn

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The Economy

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Anti-Jokes is addicting, you know what else is addicting? Heroine.

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What's green and has wheels? Green cars.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street, Paddy says to Murphy, "Alright Murphy? How's the kids?" Murphy says to Paddy, "Not bad, thanks."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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