Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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what did one mexican say to the other Hi.

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Your mother is so fat that she got diabetes and later died of an unrelated illness.

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Whats worse than a paper cut? AIDS.

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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3 dogs, a blue dog, a yellow dog, and a red dog. The owner was a man named Jeff. Now the blue dog was always sad so Jeff named him blue. The yellow dog was always scared so Jeff named him yellow. Now the red dog he was red because he had red fur, so Jeff named him red. One day when Jeff was reading his newspaper, he accidentally hit his coffee and it fell on the floor. Question: What did Jeff do? I don't know.

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imagine a world without santa ill make it easy, lookout the window

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Guy: Im bisexual. Girl: Im thermosexual. Guy: ? Girl: Im only attracted to hot things. Which isnt you.

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Why did the man go to the barber? To get a haircut

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing...he found it.

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John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

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a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

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Whats the worst part about being fat? Your fat.

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the jokes are repetitive on this site

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hey

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to there son who got an A- in math? How would I know? I can't speak Chinese.

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How did the man with no arm and no legs get to the store? Well he certainly didn't walk.

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A bear walks into a bar. Four people were taken to the hospital and there was one fatality.

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Garry Glitters on here

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Why did the dog's chin get all scraped up? He didn't have any front legs.

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What's 9+10=? 19

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I cat tried to jump over a fence It was electrified

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Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

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What did the Catholic Priest do to the 9-year-old boy? He ate him. The priest was actually Jeffery Dahmer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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